06/19/10
It's Saturday Centus day again! Our Prompt:
It was Fathers Day, 1984, when I heard that voice in the hallway... You will find it in italics in this little story I wrote around it.
We didn’t know our daddy. He died in 1955 when I was six, and Mama never forgave him, wouldn’t even grieve. I never heard her utter the word “dead” in the same sentence with his name.
It was Fathers Day, 1984, when I heard that voice in the hallway... It was my baby brother, my favorite, John, now a father himself. Then came the crash.
I scurried to the hall to find Mama, on her knees, arms wrapped round herself, rocking and weeping, surrounded by a pool of red stones.
“What happened?”
“She finally let it go, and her heart crashed onto the floor and broke into a million pieces.”
This post is linked to Saturday Centus. Button on the left!
5 years ago
14 comments:
Powerfully done, Charlotte.
Oh, well done!
WOW!! Fresh and stirring.
Oh, I like this. Very much!
=)
Wow....another powerful prompt entry.
Beautifully done Claudia. What wonderful imagery. Such a great use of this weeks prompt. Kathy
What very descriptive words when Mama finally let go. How wonderfully symbolic the red stones and Mama's heart breaking. Excellent work this week.
Very descriptive - I heard the crash, well written.
Wow, to hear a heart break....
To all of you, Thanks for your comments. I am still amazed that good writers like my work!
This was really good. Heartfelt, and bittersweet. Nicely done! And thanks so much for visiting at Life is Good.
I really like this, it was like being there.
Wow, an amazing job! So visual and heartfelt! Excellent!
Claudia! Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant! I loved this imagery. Really powerful.
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